t Double Yellow's Musings: Milestones in Singapore’s Quest to be the Region’s Sex Hub
The warped mind of Double Yellow craves for humor everyday. His daily dose comes from The Straits Times, The Sunday Times, Today, Channelnewsasia, etc. He also thinks that because of this preamble, this blog will never get featured in the local media. And of course, please read the Disclaimer before embarking on the journey.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Milestones in Singapore’s Quest to be the Region’s Sex Hub

You will not read this in our local newspapers because there has been to official press release on this subject. But Singapore is aiming to be the sex hub of the region. Significant milestones in its quest....

Aug 2003 – Ban on bar top dancing lifted
Sep 2004 – Ban on Cosmopolitan magazine lifted
May 2005 – Crazy Horse cabaret to be shown
Aug 2005 – The Great Singapore Sex Show Exhibition
Oct 2005 – Big Boyz Toyz Sex Show Exhibition

Just as Bangkok has opened a spanking new airport to compete with Changi, we are taking on Patpong head on. This strategy will draw tourists with loads of money here and put Singapore on the world sex map. If you though that we are copying Bangkok outright, you are very wrong. Remember hor, in Singapore we do everything the Uniquely Singaporean way. In Bangkok, all the sleaze takes place one floor above… in Singapore, we do it in the .... [drumroll] .... dungeon!

“.... the grapevine has it that bondage and sado-machochistic paraphernalia may well be on the menu in the dungeon

Oooh.... kinky! Maybe they can get ex-Changi Prison inmates to give some expertise on how to build the dungeon. I mean with the décor :)

Of course, locals will be shielded from all this sleaze in their own backyard. Not because the rear door is closed (well, it is if you have an alternative sexual lifestyle in Singapore), but because of a ‘hefty’ fee to enter the immoral world. I wont be surprised if Singaporeans sell their HDB flat to get a taste of gahmen-approved sin.

The authorities will be lurking outside these sleaze venues. Not only to catch the criminals but also people who begin humping the lamppost as soon as they exit the place. In Singapore as you know, such gyrations are reserved only for the bedroom, the washroom and in front of the computer screen :)

8 Comments:

Blogger Beng said...

Haha... what a spectacular observation!

10:12 PM  
Blogger OMFG!! said...

They are challange with Macau, malaysia and other asia region to gain .gov.sg income lol

11:12 PM  
Blogger doubleyellow said...

hey beng and qiu hu, thanx :) i think our gahmen can set up a "hub consultancy" and teach macau, malaysia and other countries on how to become hub in everything you can dream of. That way, we will move up the value chain :)

1:41 AM  
Blogger KwokSiong said...

wtf?

6:04 AM  
Blogger doubleyellow said...

kwoksiong, i also say... i keep telling myself that its all a dream but the signs keep coming back :)

8:31 AM  
Blogger pleinelune said...

dude - i managed to tomorrow you. congrats. ;)

12:35 AM  
Blogger doubleyellow said...

hey pleinelune, thanx much :) no wonder the traffic to my site shot up like crazy :p

3:19 AM  
Anonymous lady chef said...

more interesting news can be retrieve from http://blog.sextoysingapore.com

12:47 AM  

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