Favorite Pastime of Singaporeans – Compraining
Singaporeans comprain about everything. Right from accommodating physically challenged to dog poo in their HDB void deck. They comprain about teens who grope each other on public transport and when their kids get myopia.
But here is the best part – they expect the gahmen to do something about all this compraining. The general practice is to go to the nearest coffee shop and comprain to everyone within earshot. But since the internet revolution has caught on here, Singaporeans at best will email the forum page in the local newspaper and comprain about anything they see/hear/smell.
Just a few days ago, one dude wrote to the local paper compraining about allegedly ‘nasty messages’ that he saw some people wear on their T-shirts. One said, “I am surrounded by idiots” and the other displayed the classic “middle finger”. The letter writer took offence to such T-shirts and with a ‘Uniquely Singaporean’ display of civic responsibility decided to write to the newspaper and comprained.
His duty seems finished by just highlighting such an occurrence. Now it’s supposedly up to the gahmen to investigate the incident, run a check on the number of people wearing ‘offensive’ T-shirts, pass legislation and of course, enforce the rules. Singaporeans seriously think the gahmen has no other better work to do.
Rarely do Singaporeans decide to stand up and say,
“Now that is something I don’t agree wif. Let me do something about it. Let me get together with other like-minded people and brainstorm on possible ways to resolve the issue (if it is a problem in the first place)”
The classic case of compraining has to do with littering. Whenever Singaporeans see a strewn piece of paper, they will comprain to the management, town council, office admin, whoever. The more clever ones will try to fill their quota by sending in a staff suggestion. But they will rarely pick up the piece of paper and put it in the bin. But Singaporeans of course hold the final trump card against the gahmen. They can just tell the gahmen,
Gahmen! yes you, gahmen! in primary school, you teach me engrrish, mathematis, physik, kemistree but you never teach me civic responsibility. How I supposed to know har? Gahmen, I prove to you that I very creative. I suggest to you hor, to put in place a program in civic responsibility’ for all Singaporeans. Must have certificate one. Enrolling into course must come wif travel and handphone discount vouchers Employers must give us increment after completing course.
Satisfied with their effort, Singaporeans will then go back and think creatively about what else to comprain about.
P.S: yeah, I know it’s ironical that I am compraining about comprainers. Anyone interested in joining my “Zap the Comprainers into Outer Space” society, please email me.